No, the title of this e-rticle (that's inter-web talk for an article on-line, an e-rticle. Clever, huh?) does not necessarily refer to things I've found when going through our kids' dirty laundry. Although, it could. Just the other day, our second oldest did his own laundry and it came out dirtier than it went in because of a piece of chocolate in a pocket that melted in the dryer. It made everything look like something worn by members of The A-Team. But, I digress. Red, blue and furry describes our special guests on FirstNews Thursday morning: Elmo and Cookie Monster from Sesame Street! They are in town for the big Elmo Makes Music show at Kemper Arena, now through Sunday. Cookie Monster came up with the forecast. Elmo did the pointing-at-the-maps bit. Not surprisingly, their efforts showed more accuracy, scholarship and credibility than usually demonstrated on the program. At one point, I tried to play the Sesame Street theme song while the dynamic duo danced. Sort of a Monster's Ball.

Pounding out that tune on the black and whites, took me back about 30 years. I have lots of nieces and nephews. They're all grown up now. Amazingly, some are now older than I am...or at least that's my story. Anyway, when they were little, I would play that song just to get them to run all over the house...imitating the opening of the show itself. It was automatic. In fact, just a couple years ago, at one nephew's wedding, I sneaked into the choir loft and started to play the song during the recessional. Sure enough, he took off in full gallop all over the church. Pavlov and his dogs would have been proud!

I was a little old for Sesame Street by the time it started but I do remember the first time I saw it. I was home from school. Sick. As usual, I was stretched out on the living room sofa with 7-Up and soda crackers. (There was also a little hard-plastic basin by the side of the couch. I don't mean to be too graphic but, to this day, when I smell plastic and Lysol, I feel queasy.) I had already had the same nightmare I had everytime I was sick. I'm trapped in a Tootsie Roll factory that is about to explode. I try to save as many Tootsies as possible but then I hear a large KABOOM and wake up in a cold sweat. Anyway, as I was coming to grips with reality, I looked up at our new color TV and saw it! A television show...in color...on PBS! In those near-caveman days, we had a grand total of four stations to watch. Sometimes only one of those actually came in clearly. First thing in the morning, you could watch Captain Kangaroo. I wish some cable station would air those old episodes. I liked Magic Drawing Board and Mr. Moose and Bunny Rabbit. For years, I thought ping-pong balls were actually moose droppings and vice-versa. The Captain was always taking a shoe box and turning it into a boat or robot or something cool. I would occasionally try to replicate his creation but mine always ended up looking like a 1963 Rambler with no wheels and too many windows. After a visit with the Captain and Mr. Green Jeans, I was ready for the day. Now, I had some friends who were a little bothered by Mr. Green Jeans for some reason. They thought it was weird that he appeared to actually live in the barn. I wasn't troubled by it until I learned that his real name was Lumpy Barnum. That name has haunted me for years, now. If you pour a vat of split-pea soup into Mr. Green Jeans' overalls and make him run a marathon on a hot July day, I think you actually create a new substance called Lumpy Barnum. And, for the health conscious, Lumpy Barnum Lite!

Anyway, after the Captain, a kid could watch a couple game shows and then it was soap operas until noon. One of our stations had a noon news that was mostly filled with talk of barrows and gilts and a visit from the Home Ec lady from the county extension office talking about getting your immunizations. Later in the show, a woman named Fern Fowler, would show you how to create a lovely centerpiece using a toilet paper roll, left-over Christmas wrapping paper, Elmer's Glue, pipe-cleaners and melted crayons. A dignified man named Jerry Dean would appear and do weather which consisted of the following: "Cloudy today with flurries. Temperature of 13. Thank you for being with us. Good day." Ahhh, those were the days! Then, more daytime dramas.

The PBS station didn't even come on the air until about 3:00 in the afternoon and then it was a series of men in white shirts, skinny ties, severe horn-rim glasses, standing behind lecterns and discussing geometry or ancient civilizations or how ancient civilizations used geometry. It was into that grainy, black and white land of big brains that Sesame Street first appeared when I was home from school, sick, that one day.

Years later, only our oldest son, Alex, really watched the show very much. He identified closely with Tully the monster. One of the lesser known, I guess. In one storyline, Tully, had a broken arm. So, Alex, decided he had a broken arm. He walked around with a white cloth over this "damaged" limb for several days. In real life, one of his brothers and his sister have actually had broken arms, but his Tully-induced affliction seems just as real, in his memory. He has a very vivid imagination and chameleon-like tendencies when it comes to TV shows. It was only a couple years ago that we convinced him he could not write "Red Power Ranger" in the "Goals" section of college applications. We made the mistake of letting him watch 24 one time and he ended up going from house to house "rescuing" the neighbors.

Anyway, if you are in the mood to recapture some childhood memories or create some for your kids, head over to Kemper this weekend. I know that having Elmo and Cookie Monster on FirstNews, made it a "sunny day....everything's a-okay" start for us. The only downside is that our news director has asked both monsters for their resumes. I knew I should have never let them in the weather center!